Just for this one time, let me be emotional, let me collapse. Just for this one minute, then I will pick up myself, and live on... But just this one minute...

Life always hit you at the highest point. Just when you thought everything's gonna be alright, "bang", next thing you know, something hit you hard and cold.

I chose to believe they never happened, I chose to remember everyone remains the same. Why can't everyone just be happy? Why can't we have no history and no past? Move on, move on....

One minutes up... I know God is good to me. Got to be strong, got to be strong....

到别人的blog晃晃总是会有很多感触。也不一定是八卦，可是很多时候都可以看到你不认识的那一面，有的时候很伤感。不过生活就是这样，有起有浮。

最近一直看鲁豫有约，挺喜欢她的，但同时又觉得她挺寂寞的，像我认识的很多人，去过很多地方，经历过很多人生，可是生命中还是透着淡淡的悲伤。

前天开车出门，一直堵车，天慢慢的黑了，就随手用手机照了几张新加坡的街景。其实这个城市也很美，只是每天的生活让我们没有去注意它。或许生活是美丽的，但有的时候心境太吵杂了。有时,在对的时候，在对的地方晃晃，还是很美的。

看了看jacie的网站，突然决定要把自己的空间弄美一点，好好写点东西。有的时候就是太懒了。有的时候又觉得写了反正也没人看。

不过这些都不重要，觉得热爱生活是关键。要把美的时刻都留下来。

～小站整理中～

北宁也engage了！偷截她的图片让大家羡慕一下。

  It's been so long... since i can sit down after a good bathe, listen to a few good songs from the endless collections of songs that I've made but yet listen, go thru friends' photo and blogs, go thru my own photos and update my own life here again... and it feels, so relaxing...

iTune Shuffle is definitely a good function, always get the right song at the right moment...

  Seems after exam, with Easter, Emerge, PCGL course, time flies everyday. Getting a car don't seem to help?! Finally get the chance to go home for a few days, get to see babe and daddy, mummy. Going back to school tmr, now special term starts.

  I always love the feeling of school starting, after some time off. It gives a fresh beginning for everything. Special term is specially good, with less crowd, less modules, less classes, less hardwork but more of balancing and more of myself.  

  I was thinking on the plane today, many choices I made about life, some I consider sacrificial, some I consider tough, but God help me to make it through always. Giving up is the easiest thing to do, but I got to keep walking, keep changing, going on to perfection?! ha.

  Every country has a 5-year-plan, so I made a 2-year-plan for each stage of my life. I also made a decision today, to live life to the fullest dimension, in the positive way. There's always the prime time for every right thing in life. I won't rush, but I'll be on time.

~as usual, photos will be uploaded soon!~

  25th march, 2007, went to watch Mr. Bean’s holiday with Ruirui. Good show, gave us a good laugh. Mr. Bean going to France, traveling through Paris to Cannes, bringing back those good memories each of us had in France. France - a complicated country, meaning lots to many people. Why? I’m not sure. Probably the charm of France lies in that unexplainable mystery.

  I’ve known rui for 9 long years, surprisingly we weren’t close to each other only until recent years. We are secondary school pals back in Nanyang days, together with Bonnie and some others, we were the one of the early batches, coming to Singapore to study, scholars and non-scholars. In many ways, we are similar, but in many ways we are so different. I’m not sure is it because of the old Nanyang heritage that we all carry or the early experience of leaving our comfortable home and studying in a foreign country and survived well, we carry this distinguishable pride and confidence in us. But, at the same time, this slightest loneliness that is not easily noticeable to all. I’m not sure is it because we’ve seen a little bit more, experienced a little bit more that has made us to become complicated just a little bit more? And we concluded that is there anyone that actually understand us at all? I mean I can’t say we know each other now now, after all we still ain’t that close yet, but I sense the similarity between us, or is it just my imagination? Or perhaps with more opportunity and time together, we will eventually discover that we ARE the similar breed?

   That’s the wonder of time do to friendship. Like Bonnie and I, of course I use to call her Beining. We are the bestest friend ever. I still consider her my best friend now, only that time has changed many things. We can still talk, because of so many similarities that we share, but we can’t seem to go too deep, because of the differences time has created. Is it true that real friendship no longer exist after high school? Do they merely change for networking purposes or to chatting pals that temporarily ease our pain of loneliness and the desire deep down of wanting to be understood? But how can anyone understand us? With such complicated backgrounds, extensive experiences, of course they are all good by all means, but sometimes you just feel lonely?!

  I love rui, just like I love Bonnie. This “heritage” or experience that we shared links us all together. Yet, this pride that is in us, this tendency in our heart of wanting to meet other’s expectation and do exceedingly above what others have expected make us somewhat inapproachable? Are we packaging ourselves, trying to be too elite or different in fact drive away the possibility of actually making a genuine friend? Are we been so trained to outwit the rest that we are too proud to admit we are weak sometime? Are we trying too hard to let others think that we have it all but none of them makes us happy? Or are we just feeling so insecure of who we really are that we need what others expect of us to determine who we are? But I’m tired of living up to people’s expectation, because who I am, is not who YOU think I am. You don’t even know me!

  Well, up to now, I sound like some angry dude that has no life? Hahaha… Coz rui and I were discussing about the expectations of others and arrive to many conclusions and deep thoughts. Life is complicated and it’s not easy to be happy. But once again I have to conclude that my God has saved my day. He has shown me His plan and love for me. So I’m good! Haha, no one knows me, but I’m still good, coz He knows me and I know Him! So rui, just wanna let you know that, I love you and cherish you as a genuine friend. Let’s build up great friendship without walls, without expectations and without pride. Let’s be good, friend! Love ya. =)

离开嘎纳，朝向巴黎进军.

因为嘎纳电影节的关系，终于和babe一起来到了法国，由于电影节已经开始，我们没有在巴黎停留便直奔嘎纳，这直接冲淡了我对巴黎的向往。

到了嘎纳已经是晚上，时差搞得我昏昏欲睡，宝贝还是拖着我出去晃了晃。觉得法国真的是个歌舞升平的世界。因为电影节的关系，酒店的外面都挂起了未上映电影的巨型海报；本来平静的小镇也挤满了穿着时尚的名流。如果说在我眼里，提个名包，带块名表，已经是相当时尚了，那么在嘎纳，每个人都像从杂志上走出来的，全身上下都是名牌。我相信如果可能的话，内裤也应该是名牌。当场让我眼花缭乱，有一种想要晕倒的感觉，毕竟乡巴佬如我是没有在真实的世界中看过将所有名牌挤在一人身上的场面。我觉得有钱人的生活就是about partying, 特别是做电影这一行的。于是我狠狠地蹬了Babe一眼，问他是否背着我做party animal? Babe 赶紧澄清，“他们都是做电影的，我们买电影的不搞这一套。”好吧，就算放过了babe, 但在那样的环境里，还是忍不住想要疯狂疯狂，当然最后在时差的作用下，还是忍住了。

今后的三天，都在会场中看片，买片。我觉得还是老外懂享受，在谈生意的同时还可以看到无敌的海景，吹着凉快的海风；买家，卖家喝着咖啡，带着墨镜坐在温暖的夏日阳光下。这种生意，谈得未免也太享受了吧？！所以说电影节选在这样的度假胜地，我们的老外同胞还是经过了相当的一番深思熟虑呀。这是我第一次近距离接触Babe的生意。虽说今后会无条件收留我，但是做人要本分，总不能做个吃干饭的，还是要干一行爱一行才符合职业道德标准。不过电影是很难让人不爱的。又爱，又能赚钱，还真是一件很幸福的事。

在离开嘎那之前，我们去了Monaco, 就是传说中有个长得很帅的王子的地方（不过他老爸刚死，要当国王了）。本来我还想写个一日游，但是由于其国家人均有钱得让人翻白眼可以直接将眼珠翻到后脑勺去，我就草草记过啦。就是一进去就有想要骂脏话的冲动，×××！太有钱了！大街上随便跑的都是Ferrari, Maserati, Bentley。估计出门讨个饭都开奔驰，（如有夸张，天地不容啊！）出门楼下停的不是跑车，是私人游艇，搞得我回到嘎那当天，觉得法国人全是花子，觉得以前自己对奢侈的定义，在Monaco人民的眼里，简直就是寒酸呀！由于眼球翻到了后脑勺，所以回到了花子国france，早早洗洗就去睡了。

终于来到了期待以久的巴黎，觉得已经没有了激情。反正该见识的，都算见识过了，不过有一点巴黎是胜出的，就是所有的Boutiques全是总店，我的妈呀，好大哟！于是又拉着Champs-elysees和Place Vendome乡巴佬了一整天。当然materialistic的我还是要提一提，巴黎的确是一个相当有历史，文化气息的地方。右岸的古建筑，左岸的人文风气使巴黎成为世界最著名的城市之一。当然，我的艺术气息在赞美完巴黎这两句之后也就用尽了。反正去巴黎的人都要去的地方我都去了，算是人家问起来不至于招来“啊,你连某地某地都没去过啊？”，丢人！

但我在意的是去了的CAFE de la PAIX 和Fouquets吃饭。去了Sex and City里Carrie住的酒店的咖啡厅，去了她摔跤的Dior。不能去纽约，至少也去了法国。 最后，谢谢Babe带我去美丽的城市，让我感受美丽的经历。照片，文字都无法记载的是我们一起制造的美丽回忆。Finally, thank you darling for asking me to marry you.